‘Real Housewives of New York City’ Season 5 Episode 2 Recap

Well, episode two is upon us, and I must say, I am loving this new season of Real Housewives of New York City! What a welcome reprieve from the often low-brow Orange County and New Jersey. I love me some snooty girls trying to one-up one another in the Big Apple! On this episode, we get a glimpse at Aviva’s true nature: a pot-stirrer of the first order. Time will tell if this will change. Carole shows us how a widow can date a famous rock star and flirt with with gorgeous young men, Heather hosts a party for her late father, and Ramona and LuAnn have their much-anticipated show-down. Check out my favorite scenes from this week’s episode…and believe you me, there were many!

It was nice to see Aviva’s current husband, Reid Drescher, with all of her talk about her slutty sociable ex, Harry Dubin. It was starting to worry me a little. I didn’t understand what “Jewish by injection” meant until my boyfriend explained that maybe it had something to do with a… penis… so… if he’s right… ew.

I loved when Aviva gave Heather and Jonathan parenting advice about raising a son with medical difficulties. Yeah, must suck being spoiled. Sniff! Give me chores and don’t give me my way! Isn’t that what all children want?

LMAO when Heather responded to “What’s the worst that could happen?” when motorcycling, with, “Well, you could lose a leg… and then you guys would match!” I like this chick!

How good is this pic? Channeling Aileen Wuornos, much?

I love how LuAnn wore the biggest evil eye necklace in the world when she met with Ramona. Good fuckin’ luck, my friend. They are both dressed like they’re expecting impending doom, which, under the circumstances, might be appropriate.

Do I think Ramona threatened LuAnn? Uh, YEAH. I could totally see her doing that, especially given the fact that she retweeted the video of LuAnn’s misguided daughter, Victoria, rolling a blunt and using the “N” word, and then claimed the retweeting was all an accident.

Ramona just dug her grave deeper saying LuAnn’s never home with her children. I have a feeling Ramona is going to become the Jill Zarin of this season… mark my words.

Awww, I had to frown in sympathy when LuAnn said, “I thought you liked me. I really thought you liked me.” Though… why would LuAnn think Ramona ever liked her? Makes me wonder a little about her mental stability and her perception of reality.

Poor Ramona: you can already see the brain damage that her Pinot has caused when she goes off on a little tangent about her gel manicure. And she even seemed a little unsteady on her feet when she was walking away, the poor thing.

What’s Aviva doing, bringing up LuAnn and Ramona’s fight twice within the first twenty minutes? And I loved Carole trying to pick up a man in the clothing store. What a little flirt! Radziwill she close the deal… or won’t she?

Sonja has home renovation people over for an estimate, and her “intern” is there again… who apparently sleeps there… and calls her “Ms. Morgan.” What exactly does the intern hope to gain from this internship? How to melt the perfect croque monsieur in the toaster oven?

Sonja tries to seduce the handyman, like she’s Generosa Ammon and he’s Daniel Pelosi. Let’s see how this one turns out…

Russ Irwin, Carole’s Aerosmith musician boyfriend, comes over to pick her up for a date, and they listen to the song that was inspired by her. What a blue-blood this Ms. Radziwill is! From a Kennedy to a rock star. Some frickin’ luck.

Heather and Jonathan have a party for her recently-deceased father at their house in The Berkshires. Perhaps they, too, think the Hamptons is akin to work! Heather said she didn’t have the relationship with her father that a little girl might want, but she loved him and he did the best he could. Please elaborate! Is this some Bethenny Frankel ‘ish? Sign me up!

I felt like I was intruding when Heather and her sister were reading the poem he wrote and teared up. Some things are better left off-camera, I think.

I was surprised LuAnn aired her dirty laundry a bit by admonishing her son, Noel, for his bad grades in French. That is so declasse, so… de de Lesseps!

And I loved when Noel tried to pin his bad grades in French on his teacher’s bad accent, and then Jacques calls him out on his bad grades in math, asking, “What’s the accent of the math teacher?” Oh, ROSS!

Ramona and Aviva have lunch and Aviva starts stirring the pot immediately, bringing up her conflict with Heather and then with LuAnn. Ok, Ms. Drescher, I see you. I see you.

I LOLed when Ramona said that the old Ramona would have called up LuAnn and said, “Listen, you piece of shit!” As if she’s changed so much since she renewed herself two seasons ago!

As a jewelry lover, I have to say that I am just not a fan of Ramona’s jewelry. I actually like the older stuff, the crosses, better than her newer crap pieces. Stick to what you know, girlfriend!

Sonja has been asked to present at the GLAAD awards for… some reason. As we learned last season, she is a gay icon… and loves the gays way more than those wannabes Simon van Kempen and Alex McCord!

Ramona is impressed with Carole’s career credentials and uses another opportunity to bring up that LuAnn doesn’t really work. She’s getting a little Vicki Gunvalson-esque with this whole “working” shtick. I mean, the show is called Real Housewives… no one really needs to work here. And P.S. does Sonja work? Das what I thought.

Sonja misses her cue because she’s chatting with the gays and having a snack. Can’t say I blame her. Someone messed up here by not getting her in time, so it wasn’t her fault… but it was definitely embarrassing.

(Photos via Bravotv.com)